Is it falling apart? Or, falling into place?
The failed relationship.
The job or business opportunity that cost you.
The existential dread creeping across your skin in the early morning hours.
When things in our life appear to be falling apart, we tend to fight, resist, apply force to hold it together. That's how we adult, right? Hold it together. Push it down. Press on. Stay strong. Show nothing. Fight... right? Right?!?! If this isn't it, then what?
One question can change everything: Is it possible life is in my favour and something is being corrected here?
The relationship? It can be a catalyst for growth. Trigger points that surfaced between you were never random. They are life’s way of showing you what was buried, what needs to be seen. Left unexamined, these patterns stay hidden, silently limiting you. Once the relationship has served its purpose as a path to healing for you both, it may fall apart. Let it. In that falling, space is created. For expansion. For deeper self-connection. For energy to return to what truly matters.
The job or business opportunity? It may have cracked something open. It may be offering you an opportunity to confront how you truly see the world, other people, and yourself. It came into being because of the stories and beliefs you inherited long ago. The pressure of it all can mature you, liberate you, and prepare you for a greater, grander next chapter.
The existential dread? It is often the opposite of how it appears. It is not a threat. It is a quiet calling back to the centre, to your heart. To your relationship with life. In time, it leads you back to what matters. It asks you to honour your time and energy, to be here now, and to live more fully, to love life. It invites you to choose courage, again and again, in the face of uncertainty, to truly surrender and truly trust life.
Takeaway: Falling apart is a judgement we make based on a very limited view that things must be a certain way. Zooming out, letting go, we can see life knows what it's doing and something is being orchestrated.
Limiting Beliefs. Limited Life.
Think of an event that once filled you with anxiety—a moment when the uncertainty felt unbearable and you were desperate to control what came next. Do you remember the intensity? The fear? The pressure to fix, prevent, succeed?
Now look again. With time and space, can you see how that desperation came not from the event itself, but from the beliefs driving your reaction? Beliefs like I can’t let this happen. I have to hold it together. I must succeed or I’ll fail completely. They felt like the truth. So you acted as if they were. And in doing so, you became trapped inside them.
With distance, we begin to see: those beliefs weren’t absolute. The intensity wasn’t necessary. The suffering wasn’t inevitable. We were blind going in—shaped by fear, unmet needs, and stories we never questioned. And yet despite our fight, life moved. What once felt like collapse was clearing space for something better.
Life operates on scales far beyond our comprehension—both across years and in the immediacy of a single moment. It doesn’t make mistakes. What it brings is exact. It’s our fear, our judgment, and our limiting beliefs that make it feel like something has gone wrong.
Takeaway: What feels overwhelming is often not the event itself, but the beliefs you attach to it. Change those, and the experience changes with them.
Radical Acceptance, Grounded Responsibility
There’s a misconception that acceptance means passivity. That to let go is to give up. But true acceptance isn’t resignation—it’s clarity. It is TRUE power. Because through acceptance we become present in this moment, without avoidance, denial or judgement. We are here, through our presence our power is amplified. It’s meeting reality as it is, without distortion, denial, or desperate fixing.
And from that place? We take responsibility. Our raw responsibility for our lives becomes ultra-powerful. Not a burden, but a choice. Accept what happened, accept what is, accept yourself. and still take ownership of how you respond now. You can soften into the present moment without abandoning your future. You can let go of control—and still choose action.
The art lies in maintaining clarity on what matters, what your principles and values are.
A simple example from yesterday brought this home again. I was at breakfast after a workout and a run. I arrived hungry, and the order came out wrong. Four times. Over forty minutes.
I stayed light, calm, and clear, even as my hunger grew. I accepted the hunger. I accepted that something had gone wrong and that the staff were doing their best to fix it. But I did not override myself just to keep the peace, follow social norms, or avoid discomfort. I accepted the reality of the moment, and that acceptance gave me my power. When I felt the window for a joyful post-workout breakfast had passed, I asked for a refund and moved on with my day.
Maybe that visit was not about breakfast. Maybe it was a reminder to stay aligned, even in the small moments.
Takeaway: True acceptance is not giving up, but becoming fully present—where clarity and real power begin.
The Cost of Clinging
We spend huge amounts of energy trying to manage, control, and fix the chaos around us, and within us. Think of all the sleepless nights, conversations with friends, quiet worrying. It's a lot, but the energy you are aware of is just the tip of the iceberg. Beneath it, unconscious patterns run quietly, deeply, and constantly. The true cost might be one hundred times more than you realise, because the very definition of unconscious means you can't see or know it.
No wonder you are tired. No wonder things feel heavy.
Most of this effort is orchestrated around false beliefs and outdated understandings. We pour energy into holding up a house of cards, while robbing ourselves of real presence and true aliveness. It is not wrong. But it is hugely costly. And this is your one precious life. Some of us can remain in this bind for decades.
Would it not be better to clear the way sooner, rather than later?
In time, this weight can become a gift. When it weighs enough, you'll break. When it weighs enough, things begin to fall apart. Your strength meant it went on for a long time, but eventually you pay attention. And you begin to see what drains you most is not the situation itself, but your resistance to it, your relating to it, your relating to yourself.
There is a part of us that believes, If I stop fighting, I will lose. But what if the fight is what is making you lose? ,
Takeaway: The most powerful lesson you can learn in your life, is how to let go. How to stop clinging.
Turning Insight into Action
Insight means little without integration. You can read all the quotes, complete every course, and listen to every audiobook. But if your nervous system is still locked into old patterns, you will keep repeating the same cycles.
The truth is, we all need another human to walk alongside us. Digesting content feeds the mind, but it does not shift the body. It does not create safety or real change where it matters most.
Real transformation lives in the body. In the heart. In your energy. Not in your mind. If you are serious about your growth, your clarity, your life, you need to prioritise human to human support. A coach, counsellor, guide, therapist, or healer—whatever your flavour, make it part of your plan.
This is what I have lived. Through years of deep inner work and lived experience, I now help others walk their unique path. From where I stand, inner work is not a luxury, not an optional part of being human, or a low priority item. It is where the real work happens, and where exponential change begins.
Takeaway: Transformation doesn’t happen when you understand something. It happens when your system experiences freedom and relief through shifts in your inner energy.
💡I help people, leaders and teams unlock what’s been holding them back — mentally, emotionally, and professionally. My work blends evidence-based psychology, coaching, psychotherapy and breathwork to drive powerful inner shifts that translate into outer results.
Three ways to take action:
🔹 Book a Strategy Session – worldwide 1:1 transformational coaching.
🔹 Join a Breathwork Journey – weekly group sessions in Hawthorn, VIC.
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